Safety Tips
Patook highly recommends that its members follow a basic tips while searching for friends—both online and offline.
Please take a few minutes to read the following safety tips to keep your experience enjoyable and secure.
Recognizing Fraud
Please never share your personal or financial information with people you don't know. Here are some guidelines and examples that you must follow, we've gotten these from some actual cases
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NEVER send money to someone you meet online, especially by wire transfer. You will most likely never get that money back.
A scammer will often ask you to wire them money to an address overseas, or ask you to buy a gift card and read the gift card number from it. Once you do that
you'll have no way to recover the money. They will often claim it's an emergency or they need it for a surgery after having talked to you for a while and gained your trust.
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NEVER give out your credit card number or bank info.
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NEVER share your personal info, such as SSN, address, phone number, etc. We also recommend you keep all conversations within Patook as scammers tend
to try and take the conversation into other mediums where they have less obstacles to scamming you.
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ALWAYS report to info@patook.com any such attempts, and if appropriate, to the police. You really do need to report it because scammers tend to target
multiple people at the same time. Even if you figured out they're scamming, others might not, and your reporting them will help those victims.
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NEVER accept checks or other financial instruments from other members.
Here are some examples that were intercepted (and stopped) on Patook in the past few months (modified slightly for brevity)
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(after a short conversation) "Yeah, I run a home-based business. My dream is to quit my job and focus on it full time."
"It's a pretty safe gig as it's backed by the government"
"If you want I can refer you"
"There's a tutorial video I can send you so you get started"
"lol no it's not a pyramid scheme, those are illegal"
==> Most likely a variant of a PYRAMID SCHEME SCAM. Those people recruit others, charge them some starter fee, and get a cut. Then they ask
them to do the same. Being part of this carries criminal charges in most countries, so please report.
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"Sorry, it looks like my account was deleted LOL. Anyway, ..."
Patook does delete spammers and flirters. If the account was actually deleted it was for good reason and the fact that they managed to find you
again means they wanted to continue whatever scam they had started. If the original account had been accidentally deleted by the user, then we
can recover it for them.
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"Hello my dear, this site is a little slow why don't you e-mail me here and we can exchange pics etc."
Most people should know this one by now but this is a regular scam that will probably devolve into them declaring their undying love for you
and asking you for money for various reasons (like a plane ticket, or surgery)
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"Oh my son is in your city right now, I've been trying to send him some money, can I just send you a check and you can transfer it to his account? You can keep 50$ for your trouble."
What will happen is they will send you a check, you will transfer the money, then they will revoke the check or it will be marked as invalid.
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"What's your e-mail, this app doesn't let me send pictures. I'll send you a link instead"
==> Attempts to send you a virus which monitors your keyboard keystrokes and gets your bank password.
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Other fake sob stories. There's too many examples to list (fake widows, fake army vets, Nigerian princes, etc.). Just don't give out money to anyone or do anything related to money with anyone. The UK Action fraud has a nice list of those here.
There are certain red flags to watch for that may indicate you're dealing with a scammer. Be aware of anyone who...
- Wants to take the conversation outside Patook very quickly. "hey this app is so bad, do you have kik or snapchat or whatsapp"
- Disappears from the site, then reappears under a different alias "lol my account was deleted" (see example above)
- Calls you "my dear", "my lady", talks about love, destiny or fate
- Asks for your address to send you a gift
- Makes lots of mistakes that are inconsistent with their profile "i'm a dactor how r u", "i'm a private corporal first class second division"
- Claims to be recently widowed
- Claims to be from U.S. but currently traveling, living or working abroad
- Asks you for money
At Patook we care very much about our community and invest in detection systems to protect you. However, even with these measures, we also need your help!
Report any suspicious activity or behavior to us at info@patook.com immediately. It's better to be safe than sorry. Also, this does not impact you only - there
are users who are less tech-savvy than you and Patook has users aged from 18 to 90, so not everyone is familiar with scam attempts. If you recognize a scam,
please report it.
Flirting
Patook also bans users who try to flirt or who are here for non-platonic reasons. Enforcing this allows Patook to keep its identity.
While we have strong flirt detectors, if you suspect a user is flirting with you, or here for non-platonic reasons, please report them immediately as those
people will typically be targeting others. Most people can identify when they're being hit on but here are some more difficult examples that were intercepted
Most the examples below typically apply to people who are otherwise attracted to your gender (e.g. if you're a woman, straight men or bisexual women are such examples)
- A married person who is into your gender and who acts friendly but doesn't even mention their partner once.
- A married person who is into your gender and who acts friendly but keeps complaining about their partner and/or how they're about to break up etc.
- Someone who thinks your first meeting should be in a hotel lobby.
- Someone who thinks your first meeting should be camping or a BBQ at their place.
- Someone who gets angry because you haven't responded in a while
- Someone who "jokingly" uses a lot of innuendo in their sentences (Patook flirt detectors are not great at catching innuendos)
- Conversations that get progressively more personal and talk about physical aspects more and more
- Excessive teasing
- Compliments your pictures
- "My boyfriend/girlfriend doesn't know I'm using this"
- (when meeting in person)attempts physical contact
- (when meeting in person)increasing physical contact
- (when meeting in person)tries to get you to less populated areas
- (when meeting in person)asks for details about you
Please report all flirting attempts either in-app or in-person. There is zero tolerance on those in this app/site, and you should also have zero tolerance for such behavior.
Patook is extremely clear that it is strictly platonic, no flirting allowed, so users who try to circumvent that are being intentionally deceptive, manipulative and sometimes sleazy.
Practical Tips for Making Friends Online and Off
You should always be cautious when communicating with any stranger who wants to meet you. You are in control of your friend making experience at all times—remain anonymous until you feel ready. Remember to always trust your instincts. If you feel unsafe or threatened, cease communication and report any misbehavior immediately to info@patook.com.
- Guard your identity. Don't share your real name, personal phone numbers, email address, home address, place of work or any other identifying information while IMing or messaging until you have established a reasonable level of trust with the other party. Do not post personal contact information in your profile or username.
- Protect your online access information. Use caution when accessing your account from a public or shared computer so that others are not able to view or record your password or other personal information. If you share your computer with others, consider disabling your auto-sign in feature if you have linked an auto log-in program or feature to your Patook account.
- Remain anonymous until you feel comfortable. Take advantage of the member-to-member technology utilized on Patook that protects your identity until YOU choose to reveal it. This technology works on all messages and IM.
- Get to know the other person online before meeting them offline. Use the tools available through Patook that protect your anonymity to get to know someone before meeting them in person. If you would like more information about someone, we recommend using the internet and government resources available to everyone.
- Block abusive users. Block any member who behaves or treats you in an abusive way and report the behavior to Patook immediately. Stop communicating immediately with anyone who pressures you for personal or financial information. You can block and report concerns or terms of use violations from any profile page, from your message or IM window. Your involvement will help keep the community fun and enjoyable.
- Block and report users who are clearly on Patook looking for romantic (rather than friendly relationships). By reporting them, you ensure they don't fool other members
Examples of terms of use violations include:
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Minors using the service
- Flirty or creepy behavior.
- Members sending harassing or offensive messages/IMs
- Members asking you for money or donations
- Members behaving inappropriately after meeting in person
- Fraudulent registration or profiles
- Spam or solicitation, such as invitations to call 1-900 numbers or attempts to sell products or services
- Copyright infringement
- Any other violation of Patook's policies
Safety Tips for Meeting Offline
In first meetings, please always take precautions and use the following guidelines.
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Meet the person on a video chatting app and make sure they are who they say they are. Some examples are Facetime, Skype, etc. If they continuously dodge the meeting, odds are they are lying about something.
People who have the technology to use an app like Patook are able to video chat. The excuse "Facetime and Skype don't work on my phone" is probably a lie.
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ALWAYS meet in public. Meet for the first time in a populated, public location—never in a private or remote location (e.g. their house, or camping somewhere)
- Patook is for friends so prefer activities that don't happen late at night.
- Tell a friend. Inform a friend or family member of your plans and when and where you're going. If you own a mobile phone, make sure you have it with you.
- Stay sober. Do not do anything that would impair your judgment and cause you to make a decision you could regret.
- Drive yourself to and from the first meeting. Just in case things don't work out, you need to be in control of your own ride—even if you take a taxi.
- Don't leave personal items unattended. You don't want to risk having personal information stolen. If you're drinking, keep your drink with you at all times so it can't be tampered with.
- Stay in a public place. NEVER go back to your friend's home or bring them back to yours on the first date. If there's any pressure, make up an excuse and leave at once.
Long Distance Meetings— Safety Suggestions
Long distance meetings also pose safety concerns. We highly recommend you avoid them entirely.
However, if you insist on meeting and have gained a very high level of trust with those persons:
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Meet the person on a video chatting app and make sure they are who they say they are. Some examples are Facetime, Skype, etc. If they continuously dodge the meeting, odds are they are lying about something.
People who have the technology to use an app like Patook are able to video chat. The excuse "Facetime and Skype don't work on my phone" is probably a lie.
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Stay in a hotel. If you can't afford a hotel, don't go. NEVER stay in the other person's home.
- Use a taxi or rental car to get to and from the airport. Even if the person you're meeting volunteers to pick you up from the airport, do not get into a personal vehicle with someone you've never met.
- Keep your hotel location confidential. The person you're meeting should respect your privacy until you know each other.
- Remember to keep your family and friends posted. Tell someone who you are meeting, where you are going and when you will return.
In general, always report any inappropriate behavior to info@patook.com, and if you feel unsafe or threatened by a user, please report them to the police authorities.
Self-harm and suicide threats
In general, if you or another user seem to be having suicidal thoughts, please involve professionals immediately. You might make things worse inadvertently:
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The national suicide prevention hotline is: 1-800-273-8255. Please share it with anyone who is making suicide threats and ask them to call it immediately.
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Many countries outside the US also have their own phone number that can be easily found through an Internet search.
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If you are talking to someone who's expressed self-harm thoughts, please send them the number above. If you think the danger to them
is imminent, you can also contact their local authorities.
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Patook users and staff are NOT trained to handle suicidal thoughts, nor recognize their severity or credibility.
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If you think that someone is repeatedly threatening suicide as a means to get attention, or extort something from others, then please
refer them to the suicide prevention hotline, then report them.
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Here is the Suicide prevention hotline website:
https://suicidepreventionlifeline.org/
Reporting to Authorities
Possible Exploitation of Minors or Children:
In general, if you run into a user or profile that feels like it might be sexually exploiting children or minors, you need to take immediate action. This is an extremely rare scenario but if it happens it is very serious.
Patook LLC is an Electronic Service Provider (ESP) registered with the National Center for Missing and Exploited Children (NCMEC).
The NCMEC has a registered direct contact phone number to Patook staff. When they contact us, we can take the user profile down and send all relevant information about that profile to law enforcement.
So if for example, you encounter something that "feels wrong". E.g. appears to show exploited children (for example, underage minors being "offered", or naked minors, etc.), or an adult whose profile looks like they're soliciting such services, please:
1- Contact the NCMEC cypertipline immediately: https://report.cybertip.org/ You might need to note down the username, location, age of the profile you saw so that they're able to reference it. They have the means to contact both the authorities and Patook directly.
2- Report the profile in-app using the Report tool (under the "..." option), then contact Patook at info@patook.com and tell them you've reported a very bad profile. WARNING: do NOT include any attachments or direct links to illegal material (e.g. don't attach the picture in question); this may be in itself illegal and might get you in legal trouble. Just include text saying what happened, what your username is, and that you reported a user and contacted NCMEC.
Possible Imminent harm to user or family:
In general, if you feel a user is at risk of harm, you can contact your police department. It it is urgent, please call the emergency number (e.g. 911 in the US).
You can also ask the police to do a welfare check on the user to make sure everything is all right.
You can still notify authorities if you think they are at risk.
Other illegal activity:
In general, you can report illegal activity anonymously to the FBI or DEA (or if you're not in the US, you can contact the relevant authorities).
So if, for example, a user tries to sell you some illegal drugs, you can go to the
DEA website and report them.
If someone is threatening to do harm, you can either contact your local law enforcement or the
FBI
If someone is threatening imminent harm or is in imminent danger, please contact the emergency police number (e.g. 911 in the US).
In general, if you're in the US, the
Justice Department has a good list of where to file each kind of tip.